Running book club

Not written again. There is a reason. It was my turn to host the monthly book club. A group of lovely, witty and resourceful ladies created a small lending library. They let me join.

This is not a club which chooses a common book to read and discuss each month. No need to analyze whether Jane Austen's Emma is a subliminal reflection of the author's desire to lap dance in a gay club had she lived in the 21st century. But a chance to tell anecdotes and exchange Lusaka common stories...have you tried the cappuccinos at such-and-such a cafe, found this fantastic recipe for french macaroons, so-and-so got kidnapped and robbed at gun point last week. Conversations are a healthy mix of the benign, informative and need-to-know. I usually take more away from the meetings than a few books.

But to host means to cater...heart sinks, hands sweat, foolproof children's recipe book comes out. I pick 3 things: cheese sticks, carrot cake, chocolate muffins. How hard can that be?

I start with the cheese sticks. In the desire to go beyond the culinary expectations of a 5 year olds birthday party...I add some chopped dill, hoping for the homely yet elegant morsel. So far so good.

On to the carrot cupcakes. I am a domestic goddess. No, really. I am baking 3 things in one day. No less than a marathon bake-off. And then it dawns on me. I'm making carrot cupcakes. I have mixed all the ingredients except for....wait for it.... carrots. I don't have any bloody carrots. Idiot! Stupid, stupid woman that I am!  This is why I don't 'host' I don't like cooking...or baking...or decorating stuff.

What should I do? If I don't add carrots what will happen to the cake? Will it be too wet, too dry, too totally tasteless? I take a deep breath. It can't be that difficult. I have beetroots. I will make carrot cupcakes with beetroots. And it worked. Sort of. The cupcakes did look an odd swampy green color and tasted a bit earthy. But the orange icing I put on top soon covered them up.

The chocolate muffins were better. But once cooked, they stuck to the bottom of the cake papers and broke in half. So I cut through the little muffin papers and carefully peeled each one off attempting a salvage job. Too, too stressful. Bless the lady at the school tuck shop who baked me 6 cappuccino muffins to give an appetizing option next to the swampy cupcakes and stuck-to-the-paper muffins.

The outcome. I loaded a plate with cheese sticks and another with 3 different types of cake. Bought cappuccino cakes were completely eaten, followed by a couple of the chocolate muffins. Kids and husband got to take each and every carrot (beetroot) cupcakes in their lunchboxes for the rest of the week. Away from the house, I wouldn't know if they ended up in the bin or not.

My feelings were preserved.